November 29, 2010

The love for our children

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. To those of you with children, have you ever wondered at the extent of the love we have for our children? How we can have so much emotion for these tiny little bodies that we bring forth, in pain and hope, into a world of uncertainty? How we can be so content when a sticky chubby hand simply reaches out to hold our own? How we can feel such a bittersweet tugging at our heart when a sweet, small voice says, "I love you mama"? How proud we feel as we watch them grow, going through their own struggles, and watch them emerge as capable, caring young adults?

Really it is incredible, miraculous, and awe-inspiring. Before I was a mother I had no idea, honestly. I couldn't even fathom the depth of feeling I would be capable of, how the mere thought of my child in danger would bring out a ferociousness in me, like a tigress unleashed. Or how a small memory, insignificant to most, could make me laugh and cry, simultaneously? I would unhesitatingly give my life for that of any of my children. They can make us crazy sometimes, they can frustrate us and more than anyone else they can bring a joy and lightness that can make our bleakest day a little brighter.

The amazing thing is that I am not some super-mom of love. I am just that, a mother. Subhanallah. I am grateful to be a woman, to be a wife, to be a mother. It is a blessing from Allah that I have been GIFTED with these three beautiful, amazingly different yet similiar children. They are an amanah from Allah and I try to be thankful to Him, ar-Raheem, for this wonderful thing he has entrusted me with.

I'm just feeling kinda nostalgic tonight, missing my sons but so sooo happy for the blessing of them and Aaminah in my life. I truly cannot imagine my life without them, nor do I want to. I no longer have visions of grandeur for myself; I made sacrifices for my children and I did it GLADLY, not so in years to come I could say, "You don't know what I gave up for you!!!". Nope, guilting ain't my way and I was and still am very happy for any decision I made that was good for my babies. 17, 13 and 2. Masha'allah, subhanallah, wa alhamdulillah!!!

Please anyone want to share a "loving my kid" story please do so. I would be happy to read them. :-) Ma salaama ya'll.


Angelle said...

You are speaking my language, Lady. No story, exactly (or too many?), but something that my husband and I were just talking about.

We were remembering that when our Gem was just born, she was so fun and every day was such a miracle to us that we thought, "I wish she could stay just like this. It's the perfect age."

As time went by and she changed and grew, we would say, "Oh, no, this is the best age -- such a loving and sweet girl. A perfect mixture of playful and earnest!" You get the picture -- every age was "the best age." (Well, except for a couple dramatic months in 6th grade...)

I was dreading the teen years -- disrespect, rebellion, bad influences... And I have to say that "Wow, 14 is the best age -- still sweet and innocent, but old enough to fully participate in our conversations...what a thoughtful and thinking person she is! And still loads of fun!"

Allah is good. And this is the perfect time of year for Thanksgiving.

Umm Aaminah said...

Angelle, I always look forward to reading your comments. You are so inspiring and sincere; its lovely to find another "like mind" in this world. :-)

Ma salaama!

Um Abdullah said...

MashaAllah, I understand completely. Being on the cusp of bringing another life into this world makes these feelings just really heightened. ha ha. I am gonna make a post referring my peeps to your blog, because I could not have said it better myself. :-) (although, it seems, we have the same peeps. lol)

Umm Aaminah said...

Salaam sis and insha'Allah your time is almost up! I'm so excited for you and your family; another addition will be challenging at times (my boys were 3+ yrs apart but still...) but it is soooo worth it.

After the first couple of years, that is. lol Just teasing insha'allah all will be well! Ma salaama....

Mona Z said...

Beautifully written post! I think all moms know exactly what you mean. Even when they drive us crazy, it's hard to stay mad.

HEY! The word verification is "cherubs"!

HijabiMommy said...

Subhan'Allah, there's nothing like the love a mother has for her child(ren), is there? It's fierce, protective, makes you do things you never thought you would/could do. Everyday is a blessing from Allah, that we get to spend with our children.

Being a mother can wreak havoc on your nerves, though! I am constantly worried about what kind of people my kids are going to turn out to be. This love for them pushes me down on my hands and knees in sujood and plead for Allah SWT to constantly guide them on the straight path, to keep them healthy and happy always, to protect them, to keep them far away from the influences of shaytan, to make them sadiqah jaariyah for me, to never make them a test on me, to help me raise them to be pious Muslimeen.

You just don't understand until you become a mother yourself. Thank you so much for reminding me to be grateful for my little darlings!! May Allah be please with all of us.

Um Zakarya said...

Assalamu Aleykum dear sister,

MASHALLAH what a beautiful post.I often find myself saying words the way my son used to do when he was a toddler (he's 9 now) and he looks at me weirdly.When I explain he used to talk this way he's like "No way, you're kidding me, I know how to talk properly".