October 26, 2011

Still here :-)

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. This is just a brief update. Why brief, UofA? Because I'm mentally and emotionally drained, and I am physically exhausted. That's why. :-)

Anyway so I am still waiting on my own apartment! The complex had one opening up the first of November then the lady calls and says, "You are going to hate me.". I was thinking, great. But alhamdulillah I was very polite to her. She made an error and it's going to be Dec. 1st before an apartment is available.

Oh my gracious, really? It's getting very stressful living here and there. I feel like we are homeless. My daughter needs a home, I need a home. It's getting difficult to live off the charity of friends. I mean alhamdulillah we are great houseguests. We cook and clean, are quiet, play well with others. :-) But it's just mentally hard. I like my own space, my own little piece of this world where I can have a modicum of peace and tranquility. Ya Allah I need that!

So I am also looking for a job. A very sweet sister has asked me to babysit her 2 week old baby for her. Yes 2 weeks old. She is here to finish her Ph.D and she must go back now. I feel so sad for her but I need the money and I really want to help them.

I kinda miss the days when I could do those things fi sabilillah! But now it's necessary to take money to help provide for my daughter. Pray this works out and that something more stable and better paying comes along. Amin. :-)

So what else can I whine about?? LOL I think that's it. I haven't been taking good care of myself though. When things are rough I am the one I forget about, trying to take care of everything else. Alhamdulillah. However, I am so overdue for an appointment with my nephrologist, I need a CT scan to check on placement and exact size of that pesky little stone, I need and encoscope AND a colonoscopy done. Yes joy joy, it's just another wonderful perk of being Jeanna. :-) Yay me. lol

I am keeping my spirits up pretty well; I have days where I think, "What can I do with $3 and a pocket of used tissue?" (Thanks to Ms. Aaminah's newfound allergies! lol). The answer is simple:

Nothing on my own. So it is supremely humbling to be in this situation again and I am trying to use it as a tool to remind me of all my blessings. Yeah we don't have a home... but we have so many wonderful friends and family who would let us stay with them. Yeah my van isn't here.... but my son has let me borrow his car since I've been here. I didn't have the money to bring my van here... then an online friend I've never met sent me $200 to pay the expenses of someone driving it down.

Subhanallah. The barakah, both big and small, we can find when we just look.

Please make dua for my family and I as we go through this difficult process of moving back to our home. I hope to start blogging again regularly but you know my motto... um well I've never really had a motto but I always try to not whine and I really super-try to not talk ill of another Muslim or say things they would prefer be left unsaid. That's why my blog has been a bit quite. I am sure you all understand.

So keep me in your duat and say a special prayer for Aaminah that Allah swt blesses and protects her, amin. :-)

Love you all fi sabilillah! Ma salaama...


Stacey said...

InshAllah I hope you'll be able to find a permanent job that you enjoy and that this month flies by for the two of you. I can't imagine being in this situation with a child, you are in my thoughts and prayers.

Salam Alaikum

HijabiMommy said...

I know no one likes being a burden and relying on family and friends can sometimes feel like such, but that is why they are there. You would do the same for them in a heartbeat. :)

Praying for you, sis. (hugs)

Halima said...

Asalaamu aleikum, Sis-

Sorry to hear you're going through a tough time at the mo'- but keep the faith and your sense of humour!
I've been through some challenging times in the past myself- heck, my present is a bit of a struggle-so I get how hard it can be sometimes. The life of a revert is not an easy one, is it? But we are all rooting for you!
Allah y'salmak- Halima

madrasimuslimah said...

assalamu alaikum,
O you who have believed, seek help through patience and prayer, Indeed Allah is with the Patient.
(Al-quran: 2-153)
you are always in our duas.

Anonymous said...

Assalamu alaikum my dear sister,
to add madrasimuslimahs----->

Allah(swt) has tested the people of the past in various ways and will keep on testing His creation. He has informed us about these tests in the Quran. Our beloved Prophet Muhammad(saw) also informed us that Allah(swt) will test us from time to time.
QUR'AN : "Be sure we shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere, Who say, when afflicted with calamity: "To Allah We belong, and to Him is our return":- They are those on whom (Descend) blessings from Allah, and Mercy, and they are the ones that receive guidance. [Quran 2:155-157]
my dua's for you and Aami..

Reva said...

i am surprised nobody has suggested a donate button as yet. prayers and wishes alone are not enough. please have a donate button on your site.

Karima said...

I hope things start getting better soon, inshallah, Karima