A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. This is a truly personal post, the likes of which I rarely put on blogger. However it's been weighing on me for a long time and I just feel like putting some of it out there.
I've been going through a very difficult time lately. If it were just one area of my life, no sweat. Two things going wrong, I can cope. Three things?? Dude, no worries.
It's not that easy this time. :-( Besides the fact that I am sick ( and getting sicker) I just have a lot of things that need to change.
Often when we go through trials in our life our iman suffers. Up one day, down another, fluctuating as we try to cope and move past or change our situation. I am no different; I have my good days and my less-than-good ones. :-)
Alhamdulillah I at least keep my sense of humor. It helps.
Well guess this isn't so heartfelt as much as it is just to let ya'll know why I'm being a crappy, sporadic blogger lately. You know I am very good at rolling with the punches and keeping an even keel, giving better than I get... are there anymore horrible cliches I can throw out there? lol
Of course part of it is the stress of my stepchildren plus some issues with A that just need to be straightned out. Alhamdulillah he was very receptive when I spoke to him about my concerns which is important in itself. Also my health worsening has just added to it all. I don't really get stressed over it but as I feel physically worse it makes keeping up with all I need to do even harder. I also have some inner issues that I have to decide how to handle.
Wallah it just feels like a lot to deal with at one time and my patience and stamina are running low.
So for now, I'm taking it one day at a time, doing the best I can and managing to neither run away nor hang recalcitrant kiddies by their toes. :-)
Please make dua for me sisters that I get my spiritual and personal house in order and ask Allah to give me patience and MORE patience, amin.