When will the summer end?

A'salaamu alaikum. For the first month of summer we had guests here. For a full month, we had people here. It was so great, I loved seeing my son and my best friend but now that excitements over. What to do?

Really it's a quandary. Because of some issues in our family dynamics, I generally only take Aaminah and Zainab (the middle of A's children) with me. Sometimes I take Hafsa but often I do not. Now that it's summer and the kids are home all day it's really put a damper on our local travels.  I like to take Aaminah places, to experience things, to just do stuff, get out of the apartment, be active. Now it's almost impossible because I cannot take all 4 kids anywhere with me.

Although A does work where we live he does actually work. :-) So he can't just come home and stay for 3 hours while I take Aaminah somewhere. My stepchildren have the opportunity to go places with their mother and Aaminah should have the same time with hers.

This is one of the problems with a blended family. I don't want my daughter to suffer from lack of my attention or not get to participate in things because of her step-siblings.

I really don't know a way around this. I'm not complaining for complaints sake, just hoping by writing down my frustrations I can find a way around it. I guess I was so used to being a single parent with my boys (since Zack was 5 and Alex was 2) it's hard for me to structure what I want to do around other people's schedules.

Not so much my husband. During the school year it's easy-breezy. The older ones are in school and I am home with Aaminah. We run our errands and do little fun or special things. I'm just feeling this summer I guess. :-(

I know a lot of you will say, Oh just take all the kids. I cannot. Yousef has behavior issues and absolutely will not listen to nor will he respect me. I no longer take him anywhere with me, period. So once again, back to square one. I do have some sympathy for him, because he is always sad if I take the girls somewhere fun and not him but he has to own his actions and change his behavior.

I also wanted to start preschool with Aaminah this summer as she turned 3 in June. Now it's July and we still haven't started. I have to have quiet for her to concentrate and well... let's just say, quiet isn't in our family's vocabulary. :-(

Wow, this is a pretty whiney post. I think I'll stop it here before I annoy myself! Please make du'a that Allah swt makes it easy for me, amin.

Finally, a cute sarubobo :-)

See? Brave enough to enlarge this photo. :-)

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. So I made another one; I couldn't wait, the last one was just sooo... Oh I don't know, like the fat girl who doesn't get invited to the dance, or the stupid cousin you'd like to erase from your family tree. :-)) I felt after TWO craftin' failures in a row, I really had to get back my street cred.

Such as it were. Ahem.

Anyhoo... sorry I'm a little annoyed now. Just got a call from Yousef's school saying we needed to meet with the principal and his teacher because the teacher apparently had been trying to get in contact with A and could not. Wait a minute, WTHeck? I spoke with this teacher at the beginning of the year and he offered to send home a daily report (Yousef, my stepson, has some behavior issues) which would detail his behavior plus his homework.

IT NEVER CAME. Can you do the math? That was in September, now it's almost May. It never ever ever came. I even spoke with the Asst. Principal about it a few weeks ago. So now suddenly THEY have been trying to contact us? Hmmmm. Don't think so.

This is gonna lead me to another little rant. I hate hate hate hate despise when people assume because we are practicing Muslims (read: beard and abaya sportin', they know nothing about our ibadah) that we are ignorant. It makes me want to get a PhD in ass-y-ness (as this principal apparently has!!) just so I can saunter in and say, "No, actually, its' DOCTOR Umm Aaminah." LOL

They always, always act surprised when a) I speak correct english, b) understand what they are saying and c) actually have some original and pertinent thoughts of my own. Gasp!

OK sorry for that. I usually am pretty upbeat, give others the benefit of the doubt, but I really dislike this school system here. I never faced these issues in Tennessee. Well I mean my friends never faced these issues; everyone got along and there was a minimum of ass-y-ness to deal with. Anyway sorry I had to share all that but she just called and interrupted my happy happy post about my sarubobo skillz.

So back to that:  To recap, I first made this:

"Dur-de-dur-dur-dur!!!!"

And then I managed to create this:

"Oh look at me, la-dee-dee! I'm so cute and petite!" lol

 Alright, really all I wanted to say; the rest is just gravy. :-)

Ma salaama ya'll!

Oh me oh me, Mrs. Y

Hehehe funny...

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. My stepdaughter Hafsa has had a few issues at her school involving the staff not being particularly sensitive to our religious requirements. (So have the 2 younger ones as well.) As the only Muslims in the school district (that we are aware of, there might be more but they are incognito) we kind of expect a few things and we brush off those that are simply annoying or funny.

The following however does NOT fit the category. Uh-huh not at all. Please read an email I sent to the principal of her middle school. You'll find it interesting, to say the least:


From: ME!

Sent: Friday, April 08, 2011 10:08 AM

To: Mr. Principal

Subject: incident involving my stepdaughter

Hello Mr. Principal, this is _________ Hafa __________'s stepmother. I tried to call you in the office today but I was informed you were out for a morning meeting. As we will be attending prayer service this afternoon, I felt it best to email you so I could inform you of the issue.

(I will try to write exactly as Hafsa related the story.)

Yesterday Hafsa came home and told us that her teacher, Mrs. Y, asked what was wrong with her. Hafsa replied, "My mom won't sign the paper for us to go to Tunisia with my father."

Mrs. Y stated she did not blame Hafsa's mother. She said women do not have rights "over there" and most kids who travel overseas do not return (?). She said (I can't remember if she said Hafsa in particular or just girls) that "They marry them off to old men."

My husband and I are livid that she is equating my husband with this type of personage. Just because he is an Arab Muslim doesn't make him a mysogynistic, opportunistic child abuser. Hafsa often comes home and relates little things Mrs. Y says that do not sit well with us but I do not like to make a big deal over nothing.

For example, one day Hafsa came home and said Mrs. Y told the class, "I am smarter than all your parents". I find this to be an offensively inaccurate statement, spoken out of true ignorance.

Please contact us at your earliest convenience. Although I am aware Hafsa might have accidentally mistated some facts, the gist of the conversation remains the same. Muslim men, including her father, sell their daughters de facto to the highest bidder and are not to be trusted.

We find this to be unacceptable behavior and attitude from any teacher but especially one who works mainly with immigrant students.

Thank you for your time and I look forward to hearing back from you soon. You may call anytime today after 3:00 pm.

Sincerely,

ME! ;-)
 
Please see now Mr. Principal's reply. In the 2 previous issues we've had with the school, he has always instilled the utmost confidence in me with his abilities and he did not disappoint now.
 
Ms. ME!, I will follow this up before the end of the day and call you in the early evening. I may only have time to gathher minimal information, but am certainly not happy that anything even approaching this conversation might have taken place.


Sincerely,

Mr. Principal

Alhamdulillah he appears to be taking this seriously. WE have definitely taken it seriously. One of the issues last year had to do with Hafsa wearing hijab. She had gotten warm (it was summer and there is no A/C in the school) and went to the school nurse. Basically the school nurse told her she should dress lighter and that by covering her head she was asking to overheat. She also questioned why we as her parents allowed her to dress that way. He was very sensitive of our "cultural" issue which I quickly assured him was NOT cultural, but a religious obligation.

Anyway I look forward to his phone call and to what it might bring. This teacher honestly is unbelievably; always making snarky comments, etc.

What would you guys do in this situation? Ma salaama....

Still on vacation!

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll! I am kinda sorry I didn't bring my laptop because I could have been downloading and sharing photos as we go. Alhamdulillah, our other one is being repaired so I left it at home for A. Also I didn't really need yet another bag to keep up with, now did I?

I am having a great time but feel guilty being away from A. He got sick, Yousef the youngest got sick and Nurse Jeanna is nowhere around. Alhamdulillah. Insha'allah they are both on the mend and I guess this will make my market value raise even more, yeah? ;-)

My family celebrates Thanksgiving every year. I do attend as it isn't a religious gathering for my family, just about family and good food! So this year masha'allah they decided to have it in October so I could be present. We had it at my sister's soon to be opened restaurant, The Groovy Dawg Cafe. :-) It was great and so much fun masha'Allah. Zachary sang and played his guitar and Aaminah even joined in the fun. And yes, sisters, I know music is haram, I know stringed instruments are haram. My son isn't Muslim, he is a Christian, I just enjoyed spending time with him while he enjoyed himself.

My sons are huge masha'Allah! Such wonderful young men. I could really just go on and on about them. I love them so much and now it will be even harder to leave them. It's difficult because I love A so much and I love my sons and right now, those 2 things are in different places. Insha'allah it will all work out and please sisters make dua for us that Allah reunited us all soon amin!

OK I need to go. Just wanted to update, and thank my followers. Really I love knowing that people keep up with my life and that insha'Allah I have such a beautiful circle of sisters who love me for the sake of Allah swt as I love each and every one of you. We may not meet in person but we can pray for each other and beseech Allah to help and guide the others in times of distress and crisis.

May Allah bless us all amin!!!!

Leave of absence

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll. I'm leaving tomorrow to head back to K-town, Knoxvegas, Knoxville. Whatever you call it, that's where I'm going. I can't wait to see my family and friends again. I even planned my trip so I'd have 2 Fridays there so I could attend my old masjid for jumah prayer. I think I put that in a previous post but I'm too lazy to fact check. Just thought I'd add it again.

My baby (well my baby boy) Alex has a cross-country race on Tuesday evening. I am really excited I get to be a part of that and experience it with him. I am very proud of my sons; they are just awesome boys. They were very close to Aaminah before we moved and I am eager for all 3 of them to get reconnected too. My dream, my goal, is for my family to move back to Knoxville. I like Hudson; its very pretty here and nice weather although I don't know how I'll drive in the snow!!! But my heart is in East TN along with my sons.

It's about 10:30 pm here right now and I've been busy all day. Because I had been sick last week and in the hospital I had quite a bit of laundry to put away and then more to do. Clean the bathroom, make dinner for A and the kids for tomorrow; I really don't want him to have too many burdens from my trip. He's being great about it but I know it's a hardship for him to have to take care of his 3 while working, with me and Aaminah gone. Insha'allah I'll enjoy my trip but enjoy coming home as well!

I made this little "card" for him as well as some small sentiments. I gussied 'em up on Word and printed them out to hide in little places. One in his sock drawer, one in the shower, and one.... maybe in the mailbox. :-) Better put it in an envelope if I don't want the mailman reading. :-) Actually they are all in Arabic so obviously I was limited in what I said. I think I used "ya habib", and "my husband, my life" and "I love you, habib" or something like that. A found a neat website that lets you type arabic phonetically and it converts it to Arabiy. Masha'Allah nice and now I can leave little Arabic love letters around the house. Sweet....

Alrighty, I better go. I need to make sure I got all my last minute things packed. Please make du'a for me that my trip goes smoothly ( I have an rx for meclizine for motion sickness yes!!!) and that our visit is lovely and just long enough. :-)

Ma salaama.....

Random picture post

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll! I just uploaded several pics and, thanks to bloggers new (or new to me) feature of placing multiple photos easily, ya'll are getting' a treat. I can say that because as usual most of them are of Aaminah. :-P Enjoy!

Ouch! The ground was closer than I thought!

I kinda like the view from down here.

Swing glorious swing! By the way, I got her cute little outfit on clearance at Target for about $4.00 The "cutoff" jean shorts have little flower embroideries around the thigh and I bought the green t-shirt separate. Will insha'Allah fit her next year too!

Just doing what my mama says. I feel like a dork. :-) I wanted you all to see her farasha abaya my friend, Sr. Lisa made her. Sooo cute!!!

Lisa sent her a little hijab that used to belong to her daughter Aliyah before she got so big masha'allah! Doesn't Aaminah look like one of those cute little Indonesian girls now?

Aaminah came to me and said, "Look. I did henna!"

Showing off her "hand"-i-work :-D

Nuthin' much

*We call this picture "bulldog baby". lol This is Aaminah before she was a year old masha'Allah. Sr. D put her tights on her head and snapped this photo. Too cute for words!*

A'salaamu alaikum ya'll! Sorry it's been soooo long since I updated. Here's why:

1. Me mom came to visit. She stayed a week alhamdulillah. As my sister says, nice when they come and nice when they go. lol Just kidding mom; thanks for coming and I am so glad you and Aaminah got to bond!

2. My laptop is breaking. :-( The kids have tripped over the power cord so many times it's bit the dust. I have to bend it at just a certain angle and either wedge it against the edge of the laptop desk or tuck it underneath. Anyway it can fritz out at a moment's notice and I fear writing a great entry and losing it to a power blip.

3. Kids are out for summer break. 'Nough said.

Anyway here I am, writing to ya'll now. I have Zainab on one shoulder, Hafsa on the other and little Aaminah is playing Mama to her doll, Habiba. (Yes, she named it herself!). She just sat her on her potty chair masha'Allah. :-) The boys (A and Yousef) went to the masjid so all is pretty quiet here now. I knew I was overdue for a post and didn't wanna disappoint.

I've been reading my sisters' blogs recently and I am hearing a common theme among some revert sisters: I'm not good enough, I don't do x, y, and z consistently, my iman is low. We all go through these phases but the important thing is we are striving. All of us, convert and born Muslim alike, we have our highs and lows, our ups and downs. Don't feel bad about yourselves, seek support from your sisters and above all, pray to Allah swt to restore to you what you have lost. Ameen.

Wow I feel kinda boring right now. I don't even have alot of random things to say. 2 of the girls have been sick, I've had some more health issues and well my creative juices aren't really flowing. Insha'Allah I'll think of something really awesome to blog about soon. Insha'Allah. :-)

Ma salaama!